What has been going on with me....?

Well, this is going to be a ranty blog.

I've once again been maintaining, but it's mainly because I'm not putting in the effort. You don't put in the effort, you do NOT see the results. Things have been really stressful lately and really I'm just glad I haven't gained. Work has been a little stressful, then friday I lost my wallet on the bus, my very expensive wallet full of my life (including i.d and house keys, yes, we changed the locks that night.)

I've been having trouble finding a bra that fits. For awhile I was wearing a 42 DDD, then a 40F, and though the 40F fit better than the DDD's, it still seemed big in the band. I remeasured myself today to find that I SHOULD be wearing a 38G, so I bought one and am finally feeling comfy.

I watched LaRhonda's episode of extreme makeover: weight loss edition tonight and it really lit a fire under my ass. It seemed like things weren't easy going but she kept hitting those goals. What I wouldn't give to lose 100 lbs in a year let alone three months. I'd like to be down to 199 by October 19th, which will be 1 year and about 100 lbs from October 19th 2010. There are slip ups but I keep getting back up and trying again.

With the second job it is getting harder but I'm slowly figuring out how to make it all work.

I'm done eating for the day, I only went over by maybe 100 cals today, which is fine, tomorrow I will be spot on, and I'll be hitting the gym after work. My goal is to lose 2 lbs by next sunday, if not more ;) Another goal is to make it to the gym, at least 3 if not 4 times this week.

For those of you struggling along with me, we can do this.

"Courage is the hallmark of a warrior"

Are you traveling this path alone, or with your significant other? Joey and I started on this path in earnest on October 19th 2010. He eventually went veggie, I went vegan and we've both become pretty health conscious. He's lost about 22 lbs, I've lost almost 70 now. (He doesn't have nearly as much to lose.) Exposure Therapy Joey has a fairly wide streak of social anxiety. He came with me to the gym the day I got my free 3 day pass earlier this week. He even came on the tour of the gym with me, which was panic inducing for him. I had butterflies, but he was shaking and miserable just sitting in the waiting area after the tour, and he was all alone. Today I asked him to sign up for the 3day pass. I know right now he doesn't have the time or the drive to get a membership, he just wouldn't use it enough for it to matter. But I wanted him to expose himself to the idea, I think exposure therapy is good for him, in many ways. I think it can help a lot of peop...

"Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving."

I looked at this blog for the first time in two years the other day. I wanted to reference a post in another piece of writing. I had completely forgotten that I had revamped this site, and I like its look now. I do honestly miss writing here. So, I might try and liven the joint up a bit. Check back soon! Where am I now? I am going for a physical next Friday. It will be the first one I've had in a year and a half. I have been gaining and losing the same 20 pounds my entire life, it seems. I have had some severe health issues in the last couple of years, like heavy shit that I'm not going to bore you with right now. Either way, my immune system decided to go bust. I have spent close to a year trying to improve it. I'm eating pretty healthy, I take vitamins now, and immune-boosting gummies, and zinc and blah blah blah. I was also suffering from chronic dehydration. Don't let yourself get there kiddie winkies. It's a bad time. I have spent the last three months or ...

Fluvia Lacerda....or, life's short, have fun.

So I just read this post about 'letting it all hang out' in the summer, by Fluvia Lacerda, a Brazilian plus size model. She. Is. Gorgeous. First, let me say, my 'thinspiration' pics are always plus size models. I have no desire to be skinny. I want to ROCK my curves. Anyhow, this is what the lovely Fluvia Lacerda looks like: So she writes this blog post about how you should accept your fat body and don't care about the judgements from other people, etc, etc. I'm thinking to myself, she looks amazing, who is judging her? Then I google her and find a 'celebrity weight gain' site that is talking all kinds of smack on her 'chunky arms' and her 'expanding waistline'. I want to cry. Seriously. If you can look like THAT and still get insulted by these people (who are the equivilant to me, of frat boys yelling "fat bitch" at me from their porch) then I just hate this world. I ASPIRE to be as 'fat' and 'chunky'...

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