Beyond Willpower

Well, this has been an interesting year. One year ago today I believe, I gave up eating at the Chinese buffet. Joey and I talked about it and decided to do the same thing with mad mex. If I can cut out the buffet where I nearly LIVED then I can cut out mad mex. This year has been full of ups and downs. If anyone tells you weight loss is easy (like a friend of mine has recently said. eyeroll.) They are wrong. It's hard work, and sometimes, there are set backs. Today marks my one year anniversary of deciding to change my life. yet my October Spark goal calender sits here empty. How sad. For the last two months the docs have been tweaking my meds. Work has become more difficult and I stepped down as manager and cut my hours so I can be less stressed, and therefore, less insane. In the last two months, since the med tweaking and the craziness started, I've gained 10 lbs. TEN POUNDS. AUGH! The frustration makes me not want to leave the house. It's downright tragic. I worked ...

So, this is my 100th post. I'm glad I'm still here. :) I've had PMS. I've had cravings I could not control, I've tracked half-assedly, I didn't exercise barely at all this week, I've eaten more to maintain than to lose, and maintain I did. augh. Now, the PMS seems to be gone and I'm ready to get back on track. Counting calories proper, exercising, juicing, eating more fruits and veggies and DRINKING WATER AND TEA (I've been very dehydrated lately). Everytime I snuck a handful of almonds (craving crunchy saltiness) I felt like my control and resolve were slipping away. But I didn't eat candy bars or junk food in general. I only ate out twice and the second time I brought home leftovers. The worst I really did was overeating nuts and I had some tortilla chips, although addmitedly more than I should have, but also WAY less than I used to. "overboard" doesn't mean the same to me as it used to, but I saw just how easily I could sl...