Beyond Willpower

Well, I got my 6 month check up at the study and my blood work keeps coming back better and better, even though I've gained some. For the first time in memory, last check up my sugar was normal at 99, this time it was normal at 95, my cholesterol was 209 before, and now it is within' normal ranges at 195. These are still high numbers for as well as I eat, I feel like genetics have something to do with the cholesterol. (my very thin vegetarian great aunt had an eleventybilliondruple bypass a few years ago.) Okay, maybe it was a quadruple, but still it was bad. and my gpa has high cholesterol as well. I've doubled my dose of fish oil, hoping that helps. Oh! My triglycerides, which were 146 last time were 119 this time!!!! WOoooooooOOooooOOooo! :D At one time they were 260, normal is under 150. My thyroid is a bit low, my hair is falling out and crispy in some places and I am not binging but I'm gaining as if I were. I'm worried. I am tracking everything ...

So, I haven't had much to say lately, mainly because it's been a struggle and I feel like you guys are probably sick of hearing me whine. I'm sick of hearing me whine. It's been about a week or maybe a bit more, that I've been doing well. I haven't been weighing,  right now I don't think it's that important. It's more important to get my eating on track than it is to beat myself up for not losing or for gaining .5 ounces or whatever. I've decided to set my goal low. Every 6 months I get weighed and blood work and all that for my study I am doing, and my goal is to lose 20 lbs in the next six months. I know it's slow going, but I think it's all I can handle at the moment. I'm doing well with my food, drinking fresh juices, I think tomorrow I will start tracking again. For the last week I've just been trying to make better choices. btw, I had my blood work (cholesterol, thyroid, sugar, etc) checked in january and I haven...

Well, the ticker is finally moving in a downward trend and staying there. I've lost 3 lbs this week. I've been eating 1500 cals, doing 30 mins on the bike a night (would like to do 30 in the morning too. will do that tomorrow) and drinking water, green tea, and fresh juice. at the moment I'm drinking some pineapple, kale and spinach juice. It was so overwhelmingly sweet that after two stems of kale I added about 2 or 3 handfulls of spinach and it's perfect. Mmmmm. :) Trying to get more dark leafy greens in. So last year for me, was about weight loss. Now that I think I understand the whole weight loss process (whether I follow it all the time is another story altogether) I think this year the focus is going to be on whole foods and health. I do eat vegan (except recently I did slip up and have dairy a few times when eating out, but not since being back on plan.) and I do generally eat whole foods. BUT....not enough. I feel like more veggies could work their way into m...

The first three days... So, my observations of the last three days. They have felt damn near effortless. I don't understand why sometimes it is SO easyt and other times it's nearly impossible to keep the unhealthy food out of my mouth!  I am doing a new fitness challenge as well. 500 miles in one year, and 10k fitness mins in one year. Let's do this... Don't we all start out a new project, diet, new year, with this vigor? This...I can do it, I can take on the world mentality? Over the course of the first few months though, those fireworks start to fizzle, and eventually go out. We all stumble and fall, sometimes we blow a tire, sometimes, against all better judgement, we get so fed up with ourselves that we get out and slash the other three. That's what happened to me at the end of last year. I haven't done myself in though. It's time to get up, and start walking to my destination, car and slashed tires be damned.  I know it's not always going to b...

The holidays hit me hard, and I feel like such a failure, so here I am, tail between my legs, promising a new start. again.  but if there is one thing that is true about me, it's that I have a hard time giving up. Since thanksgiving I have gained... 12 lbs.  Last year I made it through the holidays and even lost some weight. I know that today, is just another day, and that the only extra meaning it may have is meaning that we ascribe to it. But, today is new years day and I got a new healthy lifestyle calendar for Christmas and it feels  like if ever there was a time for renewed energy to focus on weight loss now is the time. Unless I want to start spending money on new clothes, I'd best get on it. I threw out all my old 'fatter clothes' and I'm pretty broke so a new wardrobe is not in order. It's time to get my butt in gear. Joey has gained weight too, we have a tendency to gain/lose together, as I'm sure is no surprise. No more eating out for awhil...

I've made a weight loss support group on facebook, it's secret, so only people invited can see what we're saying. If any of you are interested, just leave me a comment with your facebook name or addy below. Everyone is having such a hard time I thought this might help!

What are we really saying? So I was reading a thread on a message board/support group for weight loss that I belong to online. Someone was bemoaning a little weight gain and damning their diet of choice, and overall I knew how she felt. I feel that way sometimes too. Sometimes I feel like I can't stick to anything, or, I was on plan and exercised but I'm secretly beating myself up for not drinking enough water. It's always something, and 'good' is never good enough. One of the women told her that as long as we're trying, we're moving forward, that no one/no plan, etc, is perfect and that we waste an awful lot of time and energy trying to be perfect only to end up feeling awful in the end. Or something like that. Taking your own advice Anyhow, it got me thinking...we all say "It's progress, not perfection." On that board. I've read it more times than I can count. I think we aren't paying attention to what that means. Progress is l...