Skip to main content

On allegations of honesty and bravery...

A lot of people comment here, or they tell me privately, that I am brave for writing this blog, or they tell me that they love how honest I am, that I go in to the good and the bad. I'm not here to sugar coat things. For awhile, I wasn't blogging very often. I wasn't doing well and I felt like every time I blogged I was saying the same thing, wow, I'm off track, trying again tomorrow.

I felt like such a let down to all of you, but I know I'm not the only one going through this. Sometimes it's difficult to remember that we're not alone, there are some people who make things look so easy, and really, to me, it's just not something I can relate to. I have a friend who said he lost weight and there's no excuse for anyone because it's easy.

This has been one of the more difficult things I have ever done.

 I forget sometimes that this is forever, this is never going to be easy. EasiER at times, but never easy. Not for me and probably not for most of you. Anyhow, the point is, I was hiding, and that is not brave or honest. I promise not to go awol when I'm doing poorly anymore, if you promise to not get terribly annoyed by my posts that are about struggling. 

The last few days have been better. I'm finally on track and I hope it lasts, because I refuse to go back to where I was, I have fought too hard to regain all this weight. 10 lbs is the breaking point for me. I'm fighting, clawing my way back. I can't wait to report a loss. augh. I'm not changing my ticker until my weight has stayed the same for awhile so I know it's not a fluctuation. I get weighed at the doc on the 9th. I'm hoping to have lost some weight by then. 

Anyhow, this is my pledge, that in the future, I will be as honest and brave as you have convinced me that I am with all your kind words.Hugs, and thanks to the readers who stuck around through the struggle. I <3 you guys. 
Labels:

Comments

  1. I think the only way we can deal with our weight loss "demons" is with honesty. Keep up the good fight and keep us posted.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Thanks for your comment!

Popular posts from this blog

How Intuitive eating (did not) work for me

So I have spent roughly the last year and a half or more trying to lose weight by eating intuitively. I'm not really great at it. I have lost 30 lbs in a year and a half, it's moving at such a snails pace that I have finally decided that the only thing that works for me is tracking, and even though in my head I know I won't possibly do it forever, I have to go back to it.

So, Joey and I are tracking again, so far so good. It's only been a few days, but it at least hasn't been a struggle. I figure we will stay where we are calorie wise and after about a month and hopefully some loss (not being too focused on the scale though, it's been my downfall in the past) we can reduce our calories a little bit at a time.

I know this is the right thing to do, but I feel kind of down that I did so poorly with intuitive eating. Then again I probably wouldn't be fat if I were good at that sort of thing. :P Here's to being "On Plan." :D

Also, my job has finall…
1 comment
Read more

I Was a Fat Bride

Our wedding pictures are the first thing you see when you walk into our home. 


Joey and I have been together for over 22 years. We've both gained and lost a lot of weight over the course of our relationship. Then we regained, and re-lost, you know how it goes. We got married on our 19 year anniversary, which is in March.  We had decided to get married just four months prior. So after what our friends teased was a 'brief 19 year courtship", we decided to just go ahead and do it. I know there are a million blogs and articles about losing weight for your wedding. This is not one of them. I had four months to lose weight. I don't really even remember what was going on, but I had NO desire to diet or attempt to lose weight and so I just...didn't. Joey lost a bit of weight so he could wear that fancy vest. I appreciate the effort, he looked handsome in it. :)

We thought we would never get married. We didn't see the point, we kind of still don't, and luckily, be…
2 comments
Read more

Fluvia Lacerda....or, life's short, have fun.

So I just read this post about 'letting it all hang out' in the summer, by Fluvia Lacerda, a Brazilian plus size model. She. Is. Gorgeous.

First, let me say, my 'thinspiration' pics are always plus size models. I have no desire to be skinny. I want to ROCK my curves.

Anyhow, this is what the lovely Fluvia Lacerda looks like:


So she writes this blog post about how you should accept your fat body and don't care about the judgements from other people, etc, etc. I'm thinking to myself, she looks amazing, who is judging her? Then I google her and find a 'celebrity weight gain' site that is talking all kinds of smack on her 'chunky arms' and her 'expanding waistline'. I want to cry. Seriously. If you can look like THAT and still get insulted by these people (who are the equivilant to me, of frat boys yelling "fat bitch" at me from their porch) then I just hate this world. 
I ASPIRE to be as 'fat' and 'chunky' as Fluvia!…
3 comments
Read more