Beyond Willpower

So I did the cleanse for two days, I woke up this morning after going grocery shopping last night and realized that I'll be cooking all day today (didn't have time yesterday, so many errands to run!) so I figured I'd end up eating something I cooked today. I'm not going to beat myself up about it. I'll be making healthy foods. For breakfast I had a banana, a handful of almonds, and some corn flakes in soy milk. Today will be a busy day since I need to cook and do laundry and clean. But, cooking is the #1 priority. I bought a bunch of new tupperware!!!!! Let's do this! Also, as far as me finding a more intuitive way to eat...I've decided to stop eating when I sigh. I KNOW that's when I'm full, I'm doing this deep sigh to make room for more food. No more stuffing myself, when I sigh, I'm DONE. No matter how much or little is on my plate.

I wish I hadn't had such a difficult year. I wish I hadn't abandoned this blog and myself in the process. As you can see from my ticker I've gained all my weight back. Well, it's time to start over. Today is day two of a juice/raw food cleanse that I plan to do for 3 days. (Basically while I"m off work). Joey bought me some tupperware, and I plan to spend today and tomorrow bulk cooking. I'm going to freeze a TON of stuff to take to work for lunch. Lunches at work are costing me about 100$ per month and countless pounds. When I worked part time it was so easy. But now....at work I don't bring food, so I eat pizza, then I come home and I'm just exhausted and I want to eat and not have to clean up a mess, so I eat out, probably something fried and unhealthy. Well, as of yesterday, that is stopping. My fibro is really getting to me with this weather and all the gluten and dairy I'm eating. Hence the cleanse, I just need all that crap out of my